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Showman Jerry Travers is working for producer Horace Hardwick in London. Jerry demonstrates his new dance steps late one night in Horace's hotel room, much to the annoyance of sleeping Dale Tremont below. She goes upstairs to complain and the two are immediately attracted to each other. Complications arise when Dale mistakes Jerry for Horace.
Returning to her hometown from New York, Susan Applegate learns that she hasn't enough for the train fare and disguises herself as a twelve-year-old to travel for half the price. She hides from the conductors in the compartment of Major Philip Kirby, a military school instructor, who takes the "child" under his wing.
Research chemist Barnaby Fulton works on a fountain of youth pill for a chemical company. One of the labs chimps gets loose in the laboratory and mixes chemicals, but then pours the mix into the water cooler. When trying one of his own samples, washed down with water from the cooler, Fulton begins to act just like a twenty-year-old and believes his potion is working. Soon his wife and boss are also behaving like children.
The nudie film is inspired by a Kipling poem and follows retired soldier Tommy Atkins, who recounts his experiences with women around the world while enjoying a pipe and Scotch in a pine lodge.
